First and foremost: These quotes come from short kids, tall kids, happy kids, sad kids, wild and crazy kids, sleepy kids, hungry kids, kids to my left, kids to my right, etc, etc. Though I work in a field in which I encounter kids on a daily basis, these quotes will never have a gender, address, or name attached to them. I may not have even directly heard this quote but, instead, been given it to share! They might even be made up! Who knows, but whatever the case, enjoy!
Also, if you have a quote to share, do send it my way. Email me directly at email@example.com
*Kid shows his muscles*
Me: Woah, nice muscles. How’d you get those?
Kid: …… ……. …… candy probably.
Me: Make a sentence about this picture using “has”.
Kid: She has a red vibrating backpack.
Me: Where’d the vibrating part come from?
Kid: From the wild side. From you.
Me: We’re going to practice some more “s” sounds!
4 year old kid: Awwww. My leg hurting me!!!
Kid: Are you a mom?
Kid: Then why do you have that thing behind your head?
Me: A ponytail?
Me: What’s up?
6 year old kid: It’s Buddy’s birthday.
Me: Who’s Buddy?
Kid: My Grandson.
Me: Clearly you do not have a grandson at 6 years of age.
Convo with a 5 year old:
Me: I like your new shoes. Where’d you get them?
Kid: bought them with my own money
Me: How’d you get the money?
Kid: I robbed someone.
Me: Look at this picture. There are two pigs. Where are they?
Kid: I have to poop.
Kid: I fotted.
Me: That has an “r” in it.
Kid: I farrrrted. On purrrrpose.
Kid: My brother pinched me.
Kid: One of these legs.
Kid: 1, 2, 7, 11….
Me: Are you counting?
Me: What are you counting?
Kid: My name
Me: Come sit down in this chair.
Kid: I can’t. My eye hurts.
Kid: I’ve been eating a breakfast bar and it had a penis.
Me: You mean peanuts?
3 year old asking me about her cat
Kid: Is crybaby bite you?
Kid: He not making good choices. He not get the toys from teacher’s box.
Kid: There’s a lot of things to do in our book library.
Me: Like what?
Kid: Hmmm. Read mostly.
Kid: My brother say the “f” word because he have mortal combat for xbox 360.
Kid: You remind me of this creepy girl in my class.
Kid was having a bad day because his computer was slow..
Me: Well, we didn’t even use to have computers so you’re lucky.
Kid: Yeah, and there didn’t use to be viruses so I’m unlucky..
Me: What does Buzz Lightyear say?
Kid: To afinery, in the eyeeeeeeee!