First and foremost: These quotes come from short kids, tall kids, happy kids, sad kids, wild and crazy kids, sleepy kids, hungry kids, kids to my left, kids to my right, etc, etc. Though I work in a field in which I encounter kids on a daily basis, these quotes will never have a gender, address, or name attached to them. I may not have even directly heard this quote but, instead, been given it to share! They might even be made up! Who knows, but whatever the case, enjoy!
Also, if you have a quote to share, do send it my way. Email me directly at kellyrholes@gmail.com
*Kid shows his muscles*
Me: Woah, nice muscles. How’d you get those?
Kid: …… ……. …… candy probably.
Me: Make a sentence about this picture using “has”.
Kid: She has a red vibrating backpack.
Me: Where’d the vibrating part come from?
Kid: From the wild side. From you.
Me: We’re going to practice some more “s” sounds!
4 year old kid: Awwww. My leg hurting me!!!
Kid: Are you a mom?
Me: No.
Kid: Then why do you have that thing behind your head?
Me: A ponytail?
Kid: Yes
Me: What’s up?
6 year old kid: It’s Buddy’s birthday.
Me: Who’s Buddy?
Kid: My Grandson.
Me: Clearly you do not have a grandson at 6 years of age.
Kid: Oh.
Convo with a 5 year old:
Me: I like your new shoes. Where’d you get them?
Kid: bought them with my own money
Me: How’d you get the money?
Kid: I robbed someone.
Me: Look at this picture. There are two pigs. Where are they?
Kid: I have to poop.
Kid: I fotted.
Me: That has an “r” in it.
Kid: I farrrrted. On purrrrpose.
Kid: My brother pinched me.
Me: Where?
Kid: One of these legs.
Kid: 1, 2, 7, 11….
Me: Are you counting?
Kid: Yes
Me: What are you counting?
Kid: My name
Me: Come sit down in this chair.
Kid: I can’t. My eye hurts.
Kid: I’ve been eating a breakfast bar and it had a penis.
Me: You mean peanuts?
Kid: Yeah
3 year old asking me about her cat
Kid: Is crybaby bite you?
Me: Yes
Kid: He not making good choices. He not get the toys from teacher’s box.
Kid: There’s a lot of things to do in our book library.
Me: Like what?
Kid: Hmmm. Read mostly.
Kid: My brother say the “f” word because he have mortal combat for xbox 360.
Kid: You remind me of this creepy girl in my class.
Kid was having a bad day because his computer was slow..
Me: Well, we didn’t even use to have computers so you’re lucky.
Kid: Yeah, and there didn’t use to be viruses so I’m unlucky..
Me: Touche.
Me: What does Buzz Lightyear say?
Kid: To afinery, in the eyeeeeeeee!
Picture 22 kids working quietly in the classroom- it was writing workshop- which means there were kids at the table, under the table, on the floor, in groups, and working alone- some were drawing a story, writing letters for a story, writing sentences, illustrating, etc. One of the kids starts quietly patting the table to a familiar beat- (think Queen) about 30 seconds later, a different kid starts singing We will we will rock you……. another 30 seconds and the entire class is singing WE will We will rock you- everyone is still working, I am sitting at the table with a little guy helping him put his pages together to “publish” his book- meanwhile the room filled with sweet little voices until I notice a deep voice starts singing too. I looked up to see our principal standing at the door with his little note pad singing Queen. I am not sure what was weirder- the kids breaking out in an old 70′s rock and roll song that I can’t believe any of these guys would know – or that my principal would come in and start singing with them.
when teaching science to kinder class, my principal was sitting in back of room, “observing” me teach. We were learning about the planets and one of the kids wanted to lead the class in singing the song about the planets (tune: twinkle little star)
Kid- “Mercury, Penis, Earth, and Mars…..” I am not really sure about anything else he said. The principal covered her face while laughing. As he finished, I said, “great job, That’s Mercury, VENUS (with a v), Earth and Mars….” On my observation, my principal just wrote “nice recovery” hahaha
I was checking my kinder kids to see if they could repeat the ABCs while pointing to the letters- had one kid left right before lunch-
Me- say each letter, grab your lunch and you can go- kid- “A-b-c-d-e-f-g h-i-j-k-l-pi-ment-o cheese…bye”; he grabbed his lunch and ran out of the room.